My Journey, Snowsports

A Snowboarder’s World

Clotted blood decorates my nose and mouth. It is beginning to morph into an ugly shade of yellow. The scabs have arrived. My thighs and arms host a pattern of bruises. It will hurt to sit for a while. I look like shite, like I’ve been tossed off a bridge or fought in an unlicensed bare-knuckle fight. Yet for some reason, I do not care. I am utterly content in my dishevelment. I am free.


If you have no fear, I am convinced you can do anything. The world is out there waiting. Only you control the lever that can catapult you into adventure. For it is the very one, that untouched will keep you right where you are, sitting on your couch still in your pyjamas at midday, staring at screens. If you do not discover something about yourself while carving down a mountain in the Alps on a plank of wood then you may pack it in and go back to your couch. But I suggest you try it first.

The alarm crows at eight am everyday;  first lift. Automatically whack snooze. The realisation hits, you are in the Alps. Drag your lazy ass and foggy head up, into the shower and out the double doors, over the balcony. Touchdown in Nirvana.

Surviving on a diet of Pringle laden white bread rolls, helped down with Coke or blue Powerade.¬† Every night with a theme; unleash the beast, military, pimps and hoes…. Every day has a game, chug a beer on the chairlift, do a run with your pants down. We are like dogs who have been on a chain for far too long and now we have been unleashed. Chaotic, mad brilliance must ensue. The thump, thump of the boombox that is the soundtrack to your week away from reality. Sliding down a mountainside, laughing deliriously. You are invincible.


I rode a chairlift, I went fast, real fast. I felt the tang of adrenaline taint my tongue. I laughed out loud with no one else around, I fell, I got back up, possibly flashing everyone behind me. I drank, I danced, I ‘boarded’ down a slope full to the guts of mulled wine and I met people with some incredible stories to share and ensnare me with. I got a glimpse of how good life can be and I will not be going back to how it was when you forget and fall back into routine. I ran head first into the lifestyle I have been chasing blindly for many years and already it is so better than in my dreams.

Snowsports, Sports

Snowboarding – the coolest sport in the world

Now this is what I call a sport. I’m not going to lie, I picked snowboarding over skiing because it trumped it tenfold in the cool stakes and I was correct, line up adrenaline junkies this your next hit. No wonder snowboarders invent their own vocabulary, because when you are weaving down the side of a mountain, wiggling your hips and dressed all macho with your matching beanie and gloves, a simple awesome just won’t cut it. You are stoked, its rad, banging, insane! Finally after years of trial and error, a bowl of both painful and wonderful experiences, I truly feel, I have found my sport. Now, I must pool my resources together and conquer it.

Three lessons was all it took to lap up the basics and a reasonable eighty squids with Edinburgh Napier University‘s snow sports society (heads up, it is open to all, not just students, however if you are pushing fifty I would advise just going straight to the source itself, the Midlothian dry ski slope in Hillend. Click on the link for prices and directions.

Here is a video which I definitely did not put up to force your hand to try this most epic of sports: